Things Your Boss says........

[dataworf]

I created a spreadsheet for my boss, using the formula I learned here to calculate the length in days that trucks have been in inventory. It was wonderful if I do say so myself..(and thanks again for the help with the formula)..Formatted into perfect columns...I get a note across the top that says "put in Excel Spreadsheet". I called to ask what he meant, and found out that because I didn't have "those boxes" around every entry, it wasn't in a spreadsheet......Now he's amazed that it only took me a couple of minutes to "convert" it to a spreadsheet.....

 

[Joe4]

Now he's amazed that it only took me a couple of minutes to "convert" it to a spreadsheet.....

You blew it!!!

Every good programmer knows that when dealing with people like this, you must act like it is a huge ordeal to do it, and say that it will take days. Then when you give it to him later the same day, you will seem like a god!

 

[lenze]

Every good programmer knows that when dealing with people like this, you must act like it is a huge ordeal to do it, and say that it will take days. Then when you give it to him later the same day, you will seem like a god!

So true! When I used to work for the state, I had developed a rep about having some knowledge of Excel, and so other divisions would sometimes "borrow" me, after getting permission from my boss. One time a group came to me with a problem. They needed a sheet to analysis their data for a report to the state legislature that was due the next day. This was 11:00 AM. It was really no big deal, but they were clueless. I asked when they needed it and they said 3:00. I politely told them I couldn't possibly have it before 4:30 and they accepted that. During lunch, my boss asked me if I would be able to help them and I told him the story and about the 4:30 promise. He quickly asked if I could make that, to which I replied, it's already done. I'm just waiting till about 1:30 to give it to them. My boss just laughed and suggested I wait until at least 2:00


lenze

 

[Smitty]

During lunch, my boss asked me if I would be able to help them and I told him the story and about the 4:30 promise. He quickly asked if I could make that, to which I replied, it's already done. I'm just waiting till about 1:30 to give it to them. My boss just laughed and suggested I wait until at least 2:00

Gotta' love it!

Smitty

(What they don't know = job security!)

 

[Felix Atagong]

A few days ago... the boss phones me: Felix, I want to mail this Powerpoint presentation to a client, but pages 3 and 7 may not be included. Is that possible?
Me: Simple, just highlight those pages, press delete and save the presentation (under another name).
Boss: That complicated! Can you do it for me before tomorrow evening?
Me: Sure...

 

[scrupul0us]

So true! When I used to work for the state, I had developed a rep about having some knowledge of Excel, and so other divisions would sometimes "borrow" me

lenze

I have that rep around my office as well now... i do more for the accounting and admin departments in the way of macros for data analysis than i do CAD drafting for my own department... and of course you gotta play up the turn around time... i always tell them (pending the job) itll be about 3-5 days... it usually gets to them within 1-3 and voila I'm out to lunch with the manager, comptroller, assistant manager once a week... of course the only downside is the office nickname "macro-man" but thats not so bad when your eating steak for lunch

the kicker tho is having a categorized personal.xls with all your past work that u can just drag and drop into new projects...

 

[Oaktree]

A few days ago... the boss phones me: Felix, I want to mail this Powerpoint presentation to a client, but pages 3 and 7 may not be included. Is that possible?
Me: Simple, just highlight those pages, press delete and save the presentation (under another name).
Boss: That complicated! Can you do it for me before tomorrow evening?
Me: Sure...

I'm surprised s/he knew what PowerPoint was, as opposed to suggesting that you "fax" these (hands you papers) "documents".

 

[Felix Atagong]

I'm surprised s/he knew what PowerPoint was, as opposed to suggesting that you "fax" these (hands you papers) "documents".

LOL, I made that Powerpoint presentation myself years ago (although I quite hate that program) and saved it as a slide-show. But you're quite right, after I had done some changes to it two days ago (some phone numbers, mail addresses, etc... weren't up-to-date anymore as well AND or logo has changed) the boss said: print me a copy will ya.

I never ask why anymore since I know he likes paper, so I printed it.

Then he asked: why didn't you print a copy for yourself?
I replied: because I've already got it.
Boss: Where then?
Me: Well it's saved on my computer isn't it...
Boss: