love limerick

[erik.van.geit]

Hi, all,

In another forum I saw some nice limericks by Andrew Fergus.
Can you create one with at least one Excel-item in it?

My English vocabulary is not large enough to get something nice yet. If there is english response, I'll make one in dutch. Promise!

Some other poets over there?

kind regards,
Erik

EDIT
for those who do not now the "rules"
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Limerick_(poetry)

 

[Lewiy]

There was a young woman named Mel
Who had trouble formatting a cell
Her logic was flawed
So she came to the board
And got help from MrExcel

Poor I know

 

[Andrew Fergus]

At work was a fellow named Tom
who'd tackle spreadsheets with aplomb.
But an error he'd get
so he searched the 'net
and found Mr Excel dot com.

 

[Oorang]

Once there was guy named Erik Van Geit
Who in Excel, took very great Delight
And then he saw a thread
On Funny Jokes and said
I will make a BloodyNose tonight!

 

[Lewiy]

I thought perhaps at least one attempt at writing some “limerick code” was in order!!

Sub Holy_Limerick_Song()
Dim iString As String: Dim iLong
iLong = 0
iString = "Hero"
If Not iLong Then MsgBox "Wrong"
End Sub

Read as:

Sub holy limerick song
Dim i-string as string dim i-long
i-long equals zero
i-string equals hero
if not i-long then message-box wrong

Couldn’t think of a good way to get “End Sub” in there though

 

[erik.van.geit]

That was worth a good laugh
Now let me keep my promise and get this thread international.

Een leraar die les gaf te Trente
Was allergisch voor zijn studenten
Hij noemde ze sullen
En gaf ze steeds nullen
Ja, zo kwam die vent aan zijn centen

This would be about the translation, while still trying to rhyme and to keep the rythme.

A teacher gave course in True Tents *1
He's allergic for his students
He named them dafts
And gave them drafts *2
So this way the fellow earned cents

*1 changed name
*2 zeros


Perhaps we can await Spanish, French, Indian, German, Swedish, South-African...

 

[Jon von der Heyden]

Ok, in advance give me a break. I haven't lived in South Africa for over eight years now and my Afrikaans has deteriorated!

In die ou dae het on pen, papier en fingers gebruik
Om die syfers to balanseer
Maar nou dat ons Excel het
Gebruik ons dit nie meer [nie]

Intended translation:
In the old days we used pen, paper and fingers
to balance the figures
But now that we have Excel
we no longer use that method

Shocking, I know

But I just couldn't resist