Chuck Norris does not sleep, he waits.
Chuck Norris's tears cure cancer, too bad he never cries.
One time Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked so fast that his foot went back in time and kicked Emelia Erhardt in the face.
Q: What's the last thing going through your head when you meet Chuck Norris? A: His boot
Chuck Norris does not do Push-Ups, he instead pushes the Earth down.
Under Chuck Norris's beard, there is not a chin. There is only another fist.
I'll be here all week! *walks off stage*