# starters



## The Tamer (Oct 19, 2004)

I just spent £11 on a curry, of which £2 was a starter.  I've just eaten the starter, and now i'm full.

Why does this happen?

Shouldn't someone be working on a macro that will solve these more serious dilemmas that we all face?


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## Legacy 32701 (Oct 19, 2004)

Here's one possibility :-


```
Sub Why_I_Am_Full()
Dim info&, x&
info = MsgBox("Having just eaten the starter, are you now full?", vbYesNoCancel)
If info = vbCancel Then
    MsgBox "What's wrong? Not full any more?"
    Exit Sub
ElseIf info = vbNo Then
    MsgBox "If you're not full, why are you trying to find out why you are full?"
    Exit Sub
Else
    x = Int((9 * Rnd) + 1)
    Select Case x
        Case Is = 1: MsgBox "Your eyes are bigger than your stomach"
        Case Is = 2: MsgBox "You already had a meal one hour ago"
        Case Is = 3: MsgBox "You've been scoffing too much junk food"
        Case Is = 4: MsgBox "You've got a small appetite"
        Case Is = 6: MsgBox "The restaurant gave you a main course portion by mistake"
        Case Is = 7: MsgBox "The starter was supposed to be for six persons"
        Case Is = 8: MsgBox "The diet pills are doing their job"
        Case Is = 9: MsgBox "Don't eat starters that use only potatoes"
    End Select
End If
End Sub
```

Hope this helps.


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## The Tamer (Oct 20, 2004)

Sonny, it DOES help.

I tried your macro out tonight.  It REALLY works!!!! You are a genius - a flippin mammoth genius (now i'm not saying you're fat or anything, just that you have a geniousity of elephantine proportions (well, slightly bigger than elephantine, i suppose))

So where did you learn all this stuff?

I don't suppose you've figured out a macro for world peace yet have you?

You know, recently scientists have said that there is a mathematical formula that can support Sod's law.  And i just find it funny how people always think there's an answer to everything, a formula that you could even write in Excel.

Perhaps Excel will be predicting the future next? - Don't tell me, you've already worked it out!

Anyway everyone, as my response to this post came flooding in, I was pondering over the notion that chat rooms are great, as long as there are people there to chat.

See ya Sonny


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## PaddyD (Oct 21, 2004)

"Perhaps Excel will be predicting the future next?"

Review the excel help file entry for trend().


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## PaddyD (Oct 21, 2004)

On the Sod's Law issue, the formula from British Gas is:

((U+C+I) x (10-S))/20 x A x 1/(1-sin(F/10)). 

Other than A, which is the aggravation constant of 0.7, all other variables take a value between 1 & 9, as in:Book3ABCD12SoddingDimensionsFor:Nothavinganaccidentwhilstracingfriendtohospital34Urgency95Complexity46Importance77Skill58Frequency1910AggravationConstant0.71112((U+C+I)x(10-S))/20xAx1/(1-sin(F/10)).1314Soddinglevel0.349416958Sheet1


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## The Tamer (Oct 21, 2004)

And world peace?


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## The Tamer (Oct 21, 2004)

> On the Sod's Law issue, the formula from British Gas is:  ((U+C+I)...



Why are British Gas blaming UCI.  Can't UCI sue them for this outrage?!

Anyway, if BG are saying that customers should consider buying their care products because of Sod's Law, won't Sod make doubly sure that, one day, all their service engineers will go on strike and, on that very same day, all their customers' products will break down in an horrific, possibly life-threatening manner?

So British Gas are asking for trouble, aren't they?


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## The Tamer (Oct 21, 2004)

Having said the above - I DO have the solution to one of Sod's Law's prophecies: That, when you have an expensive carpet, the chances are not only that you will drop the toast you are carrying, but it WILL land jam (sorry, that's jelly to my friends in the US) side down.  (It’s probable that the jam will be made with indelible red ink too, but that’s only if the carpet is cream and very expensive)

So the solution is simple:
1. Put the jam/jelly and butter on the other side of the toast.

Or

2. When the carpets are laid – lay THEM upside-down.


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## NateO (Oct 21, 2004)

Nice type-declarations Sonny, a veteran move:

http://mindprod.com/unmaintricks.html

Here's the overview of why this is important:

http://mindprod.com/unmain.html


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## Legacy 32701 (Oct 21, 2004)

NateO said:
			
		

> Nice type-declarations Sonny, a veteran move:
> 
> http://mindprod.com/unmaintricks.html
> 
> ...



Never use anything else.

Had never considered them to be "unmaintainable", but that is indeed an added bonus.

(A bit like using shorthand for the Item property, eh?)


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## The Tamer (Oct 22, 2004)

My code's usually unmaintainable too.  But that's because I'm a gifted incompetent


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## The Tamer (Oct 22, 2004)




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## -sam (Oct 22, 2004)

I'm deeply confused.  I thought this thread was going to be about baseball, and the lack of ability of a certain New York team's starting pitching this postseason.   Of course right about now I think just about everything is about baseball.  Bring on the Cards!    

-sam


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## Legacy 32701 (Oct 22, 2004)

Baseball? Is that the game that's like Rounders and is even more boring than cricket?


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## The Tamer (Oct 22, 2004)

Rounders... that takes me back.  I hate cricket too


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## Zack Barresse (Oct 22, 2004)

Sonny Bop said:
			
		

> Baseball? Is that the game that's like Rounders and is even more boring than cricket?


I _would_ expect that from you ..   

GO SOX!


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## NateO (Nov 2, 2004)

Sonny Bop said:
			
		

> (A bit like using shorthand for the Item property, eh?)


Touché.

My original post to this thread was in jest, I happened to read your posted procedure and the 'essay' (which reads like a rant at times in my opinion) around the same time. 

I do not necessarily agree with the author of aforementioned link. Generally speaking, brief, valid and efficient syntax strikes me as fair game (I'm not advocating the use of spaghetti code).


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