# I may be alone in this but...



## Patience (Oct 2, 2008)

... do you ever feel slightly wistful when you have tidied up someone else's data, into something meaningful and useful, having pulled some amazing formulas out of the bag in order to swiftly make some thing horrible into a dataset of beauty in a matter of minutes - and then have to copy and paste the values over it all? All those poor beautiful formulas that no one will ever see or marvel at?

It pulls at my heart strings, anyway.


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## gingerafro (Oct 2, 2008)

I'm with you on that.
Literally just finished doing a little reporting and thought 'should I leave them in or not'.  I'm going to tell the user that they just have to live with the calculating cells for ever more.
Plus, I'm sure it will get 'tweaked' and then I'll have to write them all over again...


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## riaz (Oct 2, 2008)

Bryony, as long as you are part of this forum, as the Liverpool FC fans say, "You'll never walk alone."

When I (rarely) manage a masterpiece unashamedly plagiarised from the brains of the marvellous minds at work on this forum, I tend to keep a copy on my own hard drive, so when someone does "funny" things, at least I have a source to retrieve the work and put all right with the world once again.

Sometimes I will go back and just look at the work nostalgically and think "I wish I could have done that..."


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## Patience (Oct 2, 2008)

Yes - I suppose that is a good idea. Sometimes it is nice to look back at something, just to make you feel good about yourself - even if others totally don't understand what it means to you! Some people just don't understand the beauty that lies within some formulas. But yes, here, people get it. And that is a good feeling in itself


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## Long Nose (Oct 2, 2008)

riaz said:


> Bryony, as long as you are part of this forum, as the Liverpool FC fans say, "You'll never walk alone."
> 
> When I (rarely) manage a masterpiece unashamedly plagiarised from the brains of the marvellous minds at work on this forum, I tend to keep a copy on my own hard drive, so when someone does "funny" things, at least I have a source to retrieve the work and put all right with the world once again.
> 
> Sometimes I will go back and just look at the work nostalgically and think "I wish I could have done that..."



+1 The "Save As" is your memorial of the creation and moments of greatness.  Fortunately most of my company's reporting is mine and I guard against those who would hard-code my work.


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## cornflakegirl (Oct 2, 2008)

I've been building a model recently that has to be flexible for 4 assumptions that affect the actual structure of the model - complete nightmare. I got my boss to review it yesterday - took him through some top level sense checks on the results. Then I offered to show him the formulas behind them. He took one look at one that had an OFFSET and a couple of MATCH and said, no thanks. Part of me wishes he could appreciate the effort I put into it, but the other part is a little bit smug


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## TinaP (Oct 2, 2008)

I have become completely anal about the workbooks I create for others. For instance, on some workbooks with macros, I have a Workbook_Open event that pops a message box on the screen to warn the users against changing cells, adding and deleting columns and the like. Other workbooks with heavy-duty formulas get to have their protection set. The password for the worksheet is very, very basic so I don't forget, but it's enough to stop anyone from overwriting my formulas.  

Just yesterday I had a co-worker call me to his office, "The numbers aren't changing in my workbook."  It was a workbook that was created without my involvement, so I really had nothing vested in it.  When I got there, I found that he overwrote all of his formulas.  The formulas themselves weren't complicated, but there were hundreds.  I only managed to get about ten steps out of his office before laughter overtook me.


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## Patience (Oct 2, 2008)

Yes - of course that is a slightly different issue, I meant stuff that was only ever meant to be temporary, but when people mess up you hard work that then needs repairing it can be even more frustrating. I always make back ups of files that this may happen to, but still it drives me up the pole.

I really like the idea of the message box on opening the file that warns people against such transgressions. Think I will pinch that in future!


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## RoryA (Oct 2, 2008)

Patience said:


> I meant stuff that was only ever meant to be temporary


 
This is one of those phrases that rings alarm bells for me. If anyone else ever asks me to do anything, I now assume that it will need to be repeatable, easily customised and stand up to external audit, _especially_ if I'm told it won't.
It's up there with phrases such as "could you just", "quick question" and "have you got a minute"... 
Oh, and there's nothing quite like a formula of *absolute beauty* to remind you that you're a complete nerd.


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## cornflakegirl (Oct 2, 2008)

Actually, thinking about the OP some more, I don't think I ever would paste values over the top. Partly because of what gingerafro said about the little tweaks that are always required, and partly because I always like to know the source of my data - I never know which of my fag-packet models is going to morph into a huge business case 6 months later...


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## cornflakegirl (Oct 2, 2008)

rorya said:


> If anyone else ever asks me to do anything, I now assume that it will need to be repeatable, easily customised and stand up to external audit, _especially_ if I'm told it won't.



Amen, brother!


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## riaz (Oct 2, 2008)

As an aside, do you find that after your forays into this forum, your knowledge of Excel has increased to such an extent that you are now the acknowledged office expert on _anything_ IT related?  As in, "You're an Excel expert, can you help me recover my Word doc that I worked on for four hours and exited without saving"?


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## TinaP (Oct 2, 2008)

I'm so used to creating workbooks/formulas that are only temporary that they don't even register anymore.


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## riaz (Oct 2, 2008)

cornflakegirl said:


> I never know which of my fag-packet models is going to morph into a huge business case 6 months later...


 That's going to be difficult now, Emma, with fag packets covered in "pretty" pictures.


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## Patience (Oct 2, 2008)

Hmm Rory,- well yes, I guess so. I should explain what prompted my current musings I suppose. I inherited a file that had months across the top, and loads of projects and cost areas down the left with the little boxes filled in with numbers. Not exactly pivotable or useful in many ways. Although it didn't take long I added a column for 'months' and copied the categories 12 times. Rather than cut and paste the numbers into one column I thought 'I can do this more quickly with a bit of OFFSET, MATCH, throw in a bit LEN, RIGHT etc to taste and a pinch of LOOKUP.'

I am the only person who will ever use this data, although I will now be running reports from it that I will distribute. I have no need to do anything else with it - so my formulas were now just taking up space, so needed to go. It just hurt.

I have been burned by the odd 'please make it so my numbers change again' questions a few times. Agh.

I recognise that I am real geek/nerd for this stuff, which makes it even harder to call someone over and say 'Hey, look at THIS!' Maybe we should have a thread here to post things that we are proud of that may be worthy of admiration. You guys would understand!


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## cornflakegirl (Oct 2, 2008)

Riaz - I'm going to start tearing beer mats open instead


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## Patience (Oct 2, 2008)

cornflakegirl said:


> I never know which of my fag-packet models is going to morph into a huge business case 6 months later...



Yeah - that is a whole other issue here where I work - and in fact that is exactly what the file is I am currently TRYING to rescue. Several months ago I had the best **** budget file ever, which was ignored - this new one was created (real fag packet stuff) using just values, no links to anything - nada. I said at the time this was only going to cause more problems down the line.

Well, I was right. The excrement hit the cooling device yesterday, I spent a chunk of time sobbing in the loos after getting the blame for it, and am now spending today trying to make the best of a pretty awful situation. Why do we do this to ourselves, eh? *sigh*


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## cornflakegirl (Oct 2, 2008)

Don't get me started on budget models! The number of times I've had a manager make a hard-keyed adjustment to a budget model because it was for a deadline and there wasn't time to do it properly. You always get left with non-sensical numbers by the time you try to filter the change back down to the bottom.

(Oh, and hugs for yesterday. If that's okay. I'm not sure this is a very huggy board...)


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## riaz (Oct 2, 2008)

cornflakegirl said:


> Riaz - I'm going to start tearing beer mats open instead



I don't drink, so that is not an option for me   Whaddamigonnado?


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## Patience (Oct 2, 2008)

cornflakegirl said:


> (Oh, and hugs for yesterday. If that's okay. I'm not sure this is a very huggy board...)



Oh, I'll except hugs from anyone nice! Thank you.


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## cornflakegirl (Oct 2, 2008)

riaz said:


> I don't drink, so that is not an option for me



I get my supplies from Rory. I'm sure he has enough for all of us


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## riaz (Oct 2, 2008)

cornflakegirl said:


> I'm not sure this is a very huggy board...)


What's a huggy board?  Anything like a smorgasbord?


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## cornflakegirl (Oct 2, 2008)

I don't know. Are smorgas like hugs?


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## RoryA (Oct 2, 2008)

By all standards I have come across, this _is_ quite a huggy board, and should never be ashamed so to be. If we can't be our own support group, I don't know who will be! 
I have a distinguished ( to my mind anyway) history of calling a spade a #%$&ing shovel, so my bosses can never really pretend to claim I didn't warn them. Doesn't always make me popular, but they have learned that there's usually a good reason if I swear at them, and gradually they are starting to pay attention!


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## RoryA (Oct 2, 2008)

riaz said:


> What's a huggy board? Anything like a smorgasbord?


 
only if the Swedish version of Starsky and Hutch had smorgasbear in it.


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## riaz (Oct 2, 2008)

For all of us who feel proprietary about our masterpieces, here is a bit I found on "A smorgasbord of classics", left as comments in his code by a fellow feeling programmer.

**   This source code is a part of the legendary Total For-Ex (TFE)
**   trading system, supporting foreign exchange trading activity
**   at Initech Investments.  The system must work on a virtually
**   continuous basis and I, the undersigned programmer, am its
**   benefactor and protector.  As we are truly in the medieval 
**   ages of software development, I am a big fan of simple code.
**   Another artifact unto the Ages....   
**   Custom code - 100% Recyclable, 100% Biodegradable


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## Greg Truby (Oct 2, 2008)

"...huggy board...smorgasbear..." «¡brilliant!» 

Bryony, riaz hit the nail on the head when he said "you'll never walk alone" as long as your a member of this board. All of our power members have gone through what you are.

For formulas of exceptional beauty that I have found on this board, I tend to copy them into a worksheet in _Personal.xls_ Then when I need them or something like them, I can completely forget that they're there and spend an hour re-inventing them due to my pi__ poor memory.  Here are the descriptions of some I have picked up over the years:

Formula to put WS Name into Cell
Most Commonly Occurring String in a Range
Count Unique Values in a Range
Calculate the number of characters in common
Longest word in a cell
Test to see if A1 is a prime number
To make a calendar
What I _wish_ I had done was to also create a log over the years of workbooks that contained particularly elegant formulae or bits of code because now I'm faced with the decision _"I *know* I have solved this *exact same problem* before... so will it take me longer to remember where and find the damñed workbook than it will take me to just solve it *again*?"_ [Of course, I would probably forget that I had the ruddy log, so perhaps the point is moot.]

And regarding some of our "whoa, that's purdy, right dere" moments -- see this thread from three years ago; which was resurrected for a bit last spring. I would actually encourage anyone that still uses XL2003 or lower frequently to peruse the thread if for no other reason than because it features Stephen Dunn's _*V()*_ UDF.


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## Long Nose (Oct 2, 2008)

cornflakegirl said:


> I get my supplies from Rory. I'm sure he has enough for all of us



Anyone else like Caol Ila?


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## Fazza (Oct 2, 2008)

There are a couple of guys I've worked with for a few years; I end up creating any complex spreadsheets for them. When I have a neat new spreadsheet it is good to demonstrate it to them. They have an appreciation of what is being done.

One thing for me though is that most of my spreadsheets don't have formulas. I use a lot of ADO & SQL maybe on a few worksheet events. So data in some files or worksheets and opening another file or moving to a summary worksheet will pull the data and do the magic. Maybe generate a consolidation or report or new data file for our real database.


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## Darren Bartrup (Oct 3, 2008)

rorya said:


> I have a distinguished ( to my mind anyway) history of calling a spade a #%$&ing shovel



I try to do that, but there's too many people in the office who like to call it a mobile soil conveyance device and that always confuses the issue.

Any particularly nice formulas or snippets of code I put into a Wiki which sits on our teams network - www.tiddlywiki.com .
Makes searching for these things much easier and when asked for the nth time how to do something I can now tell them to look on the Wiki.

Also, what is the problem with supplying a spec?  I'm sure the people who ask for a spreadsheet/database know what they want the finished article to do but instead they give you a vague "here's some numbers, can you make it do something" approach.
Then there's the scope creep that ALWAYS happens - I remembering reading somewhere that it's like someone asking you for a map, so you give them a nice 2D map.  They then ask for it in 3D.  They then ask to be able to fly through it.  Only a _small_ difference from the original request. 

And why do people think they know how long it will take to do something?  I was recently asked for four hours of my time to create some charts.... 3 months later I was finished.  The main reason - no spec, and scope creep.

Sorry, rant over now


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## Richard Schollar (Oct 3, 2008)

Greg Truby said:


> And regarding some of our "whoa, that's purdy, right dere" moments -- see this thread from three years ago; which was resurrected for a bit last spring. I would actually encourage anyone that still uses XL2003 or lower frequently to peruse the thread if for no other reason than because it features Stephen Dunn's _*V()*_ UDF.


 
Greg - how could I have missed that function?! i believe I even posted into that thread at some point.  i must have had my 'Stoopid' hat on when i first read the code'cos I didn't get it, but looking at it again it is really clever   Thanks!


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## Long Nose (Oct 3, 2008)

+1 on the Variant


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## HalfAce (Oct 3, 2008)

> Maybe we should have a thread here to post things that we are proud of that may be worthy of admiration. You guys would understand!


Amen to that! I finally gave up trying to show my wife hours & hours of work by clicking a button that executes hundreds & hundreds of lines of code, only to have her respond with "Oh, neat." (No, no, no! That is waaayyy more than just "_neat_"!!!)


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## Nyanko (Oct 8, 2008)

HalfAce said:


> Amen to that! I finally gave up trying to show my wife hours & hours of work by clicking a button that executes hundreds & hundreds of lines of code, only to have her respond with "Oh, neat." (No, no, no! That is waaayyy more than just "_neat_"!!!)



Oh that is so true.

There is nothing worse that slaving over a monster of a sheet and transforming it into a gorgeous, efficient spreadsheet full of complex (but elegant) formulas and code; full error checking; and complete end user interaction ... only to have the boss say "That's nice" and is only really impressed by the fact that some of the cells are coloured in.   (-_-)#

Siiiiiiiiiigh

It's so frustrating when no one understands a truely AWESOME spreadsheet when they see it.


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## MrKowz (Oct 8, 2008)

Nyanko said:


> Oh that is so true.
> 
> There is nothing worse that slaving over a monster of a sheet and transforming it into a gorgeous, efficient spreadsheet full of complex (but elegant) formulas and code; full error checking; and complete end user interaction ... only to have the boss say "That's nice" and is only really impressed by the fact that some of the cells are coloured in. (-_-)#
> 
> ...


 
O man, I hear you there.... I wrote this 20 page macro that compiled a report my manager requested monthly from me.  I got tired of her asking for it when I was busy with other things, so I gave her the macro and showed her how to use it.  I explained what all it did, and her first response was "Oooh!  I like the colors and how the borders are set up!"

I was about ready to facepalm myself after that one...


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## Nyanko (Oct 9, 2008)

MrKowz said:


> I was about ready to facepalm myself after that one...



Face-palm
Head-desk
Head-wall
... been there

However on a more serious note, I find it particully frustrating as my skill level and contribution never seems to be acknowledged and pay rise and bonus time. (I don't get one).

Anyhoo, I'm off on Maternity leave at the end of the month, so let's see how they cope then bwahahahahahaha !!!


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## Richard Schollar (Oct 9, 2008)

Nyanko said:


> Anyhoo, I'm off on Maternity leave at the end of the month, so let's see how they cope then bwahahahahahaha !!!


 
Congratulations!  Is it your first?


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## Domski (Oct 9, 2008)

RichardSchollar said:


> Congratulations! Is it your first?


 
You've got him started on babies now!!!


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## Nyanko (Oct 9, 2008)

RichardSchollar said:


> Congratulations!  Is it your first?



Yep... both baby daddy and I are complete geeks, so I'm guessing baby will learn to type before they walk. On the first scan it looked like littlen' already had a nintendo DS in there !!! 

I _intend_ to spend my mat leave learning some more excel stuff, and hopefully I can try to answer some questions round here not just ask them !!!!


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## Greg Truby (Oct 9, 2008)

Congratulations on the baby! And commiserations on the boss thing. I recently tried to explain to my boss that it would take me several days to automate a process only to have him tell me I needed to talk to the engineer we have on staff. He'd heard that the engineer "uses macros to pull in a report". At least the engineer got a good chuckle out of it when I told him. After all, I'm the guy he comes to for help when he gets stuck. 


Nyanko said:


> I intend to spend my mat leave learning some more excel stuff, and hopefully I can try to answer some questions round here not just ask them !!!!


Don't mean to rain on your parade - but that's spoken like a true rookie. Your #1 priority will be getting enough sleep. Your #2 priority will be getting enough sleep. Your #3 priority will be getting enough sleep. Your #4 [this will be your husband's #1] will be not running out diapers (or nappies in Richard's case) and, if you're not breastfeeding, not running out of formula. Somewhere around 5th place is keeping enough laundry clean to where you can leave the house in something that doesn't smell offensive. 6th place would probably be being able to find a clean pot, plate or cup. 7th is keeping the bills current enough to where they don't turn off the electricity & water. By all means go ahead and hold on to the dream of polishing some Excel skillz -- but don't be too surprised if your progress is slightly less than amazing.


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## MrKowz (Oct 9, 2008)

Greg speaks the truth!  My sister just had her first.  She and my brother in law are lucky if they get 3 hours of solid sleep a night.  And the diaper thing... babies poop... a lot.  My new nephew likes to go RIGHT after you change him too...

Also, diapers cost a lot as well.  Gave my sister a $100 gift card to Target for her diaper-buying-needs... she blew through that in just a matter of days.


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## Nyanko (Oct 9, 2008)

Dammit ...... 

..... don't burst my bubble, guys. I just keep repeating to myself that everything WILL be amazing and maybe I'll have some extra time to learn another language too.

[/denial]


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## Greg Truby (Oct 9, 2008)

MrKowz said:


> ...Gave my sister a $100 gift card to Target for her diaper-buying-needs...


LOL - _before_ we had kids I was in the "give them a cute outfit camp".  _After_ having kids, I am in the "give them a couple of packs of diapers and a gift card" camp.  The diapers *will* be used whereas the cute outfit may or may not be used more than once or twice before it's outgrown.  And to my mind, a new parent faces plenty of drudgery as it is.  Shopping for a new baby outfit is one of the few _pleasures_ of having a newborn. So if they want to spend the gift card on that, then great.  And if money is tight, they can use the gift card on necessities.


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## Greg Truby (Oct 9, 2008)

Nyanko said:


> ...I just keep repeating to myself that everything WILL be amazing


Oh, make no mistake.  It *will be AMAZING!*  Just in a completely different way than what you think!


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## cornflakegirl (Oct 9, 2008)

Buy cloth nappies. Save a fortune. And the planet 

And breastfeed. Feed baby with one hand, MrExcel with the other. Sorted!


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## RoryA (Oct 9, 2008)

cornflakegirl said:


> Buy cloth nappies. Save a fortune. And the planet
> 
> And breastfeed. Feed baby with one hand, MrExcel with the other. Sorted!


 
Does MrExcel need feeding??


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## cornflakegirl (Oct 9, 2008)




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## Greg Truby (Oct 9, 2008)

cornflakegirl said:


> Buy cloth nappies. Save a fortune. And the planet.


Never have seen a definitive study -- is the environmental impact of the cloth nappies lower?  By the time you factor in the water & energy usage of the cleaning?  And, personally? I never *volunteered* to change a doogie diaper.  Got drafted a few times... Pee'd no prob, but fully loaded? Huh uh. Nonetheless I learned that you *always* have the new diaper unfolded and ready to go, the wipes out of the box and ready and the cap off the diaper rash ointment *before* you crack the seal on the diaper-in-use.


cornflakegirl said:


> And breastfeed. Feed baby with one hand, MrExcel with the other. Sorted!


And if you make a post that's naught but 8,426 spaces, we'll know that you fell asleep and your head is resting on the space bar.


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## cornflakegirl (Oct 9, 2008)

There was a study published a couple of years ago, but it was based on people using terry nappies rather than the modern ones (because of small sample sizes), and some of the assumptions got quite weird (ironing the nappies etc). The outcome was that disposables and cloth had roughly the same impact (with their assumptions) but that consumers can reduce the impact of cloth by eg not tumble drying (or ironing), washing at lower temperatures, but that only manufacturers can reduce the impact of disposables.

And what's the big problem with pooey nappies? Breastfed poo doesn't smell and just soaks into the nappy (with cloth, anyway), so it all just goes straight in the washing machine. And once they're on solids, it's solid, and just falls neatly into the toilet. (Although I will admit that the first couple of weeks of weaning is a bit grim poowise  )


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## cornflakegirl (Oct 9, 2008)

Environment agency report

WEN response

I'll shut up now


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## Richard Schollar (Oct 9, 2008)

You don't half talk a lot of sh*t Emma!

I've only had the pleasure of changing a few 'loaded' nappies/diapers.  Fortunately my wife seems happy enough to look after those areas...


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## cornflakegirl (Oct 9, 2008)

You useless bunch! I'm glad I'm not married to any of you!


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## Greg Truby (Oct 9, 2008)

cornflakegirl said:


> And what's the big problem with pooey nappies? Breastfed poo doesn't smell and just soaks into the nappy (with cloth, anyway), so it all just goes straight in the washing machine. And once they're on solids, it's solid, and just falls neatly into the toilet. (Although I will admit that the first couple of weeks of weaning is a bit grim poowise)


Yup heard all o' dat same nonsense from my Mrs. Don't care if'n ya do call me a great big nancy, I ain't gonna step forward ta change one - gotta poke me with a cattle prod. An' dat pea-pickin' zinc oxide ointment is like handlin' tar. The stuff gets *everywhere*.


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## cornflakegirl (Oct 9, 2008)




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## Greg Truby (Oct 9, 2008)

cornflakegirl said:


> You useless bunch! I'm glad I'm not married to any of you!


Actually, it's all about coverin' Rory's six fer 'im.  Me 'n' Richard are tryin' ta give him documentation he can take to his better half 'n' say _"see, honey, none of the other MS MVP's have ta change pooey nappies!"_


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## Richard Schollar (Oct 9, 2008)

The female is superior to the male and we should rejoice in this by permitting them to demonstrate their superiority.


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## TinaP (Oct 9, 2008)

RichardSchollar said:


> Women are just _better _than men at certain things
> 
> The female is superior to the male and we should rejoice in this by permitting them to demonstrate their superiority.


 
We need to put a diaper around that load.


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## RoryA (Oct 9, 2008)

RichardSchollar said:


> Women are just _better _than men at certain things


 
Unlike Greg's argument (as if my wife will listen to a bunch of nerds), that might work. She certianly uses it on me whenever she doesn't want to do something!


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## Greg Truby (Oct 9, 2008)

rorya said:
			
		

> "Je suis un âne. Je ne suis pas ce que je suis car si je suis ce que je suis, je ne suis pas ce que je suis."


 
Taken from a deleted scene from _Shrek the Third_ which featured a besotted Puss-in-Boots post visit to Merlin, perhaps?


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## cornflakegirl (Oct 9, 2008)

I'm willing to accept a lower standard of work in the interests of fairness


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## cornflakegirl (Oct 9, 2008)

Greg Truby said:


> Taken from a deleted scene from _Shrek the Third_ which featured a besotted Puss-in-Boots post visit to Merlin, perhaps?



Rory - you'd better make him suffer as much as I did on this one!


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## Richard Schollar (Oct 9, 2008)

Specialisation - it's the key to economic growth.  Rory, save the economy by refusing to change a diaper!


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## Richard Schollar (Oct 9, 2008)

I'm going to shut up now before my stock falls any further with the female MrExcel contingent...


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## Greg Truby (Oct 9, 2008)

RichardSchollar said:


> ...before my stock falls any further...


Ever the contrarian. Everyone else's stock is happily plummeting into the ninth level of the inferno, why not come along for the ride?


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## RoryA (Oct 9, 2008)

Greg Truby said:


> Taken from a deleted scene from _Shrek the Third_ which featured a besotted Puss-in-Boots post visit to Merlin, perhaps?


 
Non, pas du tout, mon ami. Y'a pas de magie ici.


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## Greg Truby (Oct 9, 2008)

rorya said:


> Non, pas du tout, mon ami. Y'a pas de magie ici.


 
I'm guessing it's another one of your "humpty dumpty" hooziwhazzits. Never had any instruction in French, so kinda guessin' as to what it's supposed to sound like...

_Je suis un âne. Je ne suis pas ce que je suis car si je suis ce que je suis, je ne suis pas ce que je suis._

zhe swee uh an zhe nuh swee pah say kay zhu swee car see zhe swee say kay zhu swee zhu nuh swee pah say kay zhe swee

It certainly appears to have the cadence of a nursery rhyme.  But if it is, I'm not sussing out which one...


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## cornflakegirl (Oct 9, 2008)

I was sat here for ages trying to make that work as well!

This one isn't a nursery rhyme - it's entirely about the meaning of the words.


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## Greg Truby (Oct 9, 2008)

cornflakegirl said:


> ... it's entirely about the meaning of the words.


 
Oh, so it _is_ the Popeye song after all... _"I yam what I yam and that's all that I yam..."_


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## SydneyGeek (Oct 13, 2008)

riaz said:


> As an aside, do you find that after your forays into this forum, your knowledge of Excel has increased to such an extent that you are now the acknowledged office expert on _anything_ IT related? As in, "You're an Excel expert, can you help me recover my Word doc that I worked on for four hours and exited without saving"?


 
...or, "I've got a problem with this application on my Blackberry. Could you help me sort it out please?"

Denis


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## SydneyGeek (Oct 13, 2008)

Greg Truby said:


> Oh, so it _is_ the Popeye song after all... _"I yam what I yam and that's all that I yam..."_


 
... which could be a personal statement, or a comment on sweet potatoes.

Denis


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## HalfAce (Oct 14, 2008)

> Don't mean to rain on your parade - but that's spoken like a true rookie. Your #1 priority will be getting enough sleep. Your #2 priority will be getting enough sleep. Your #3 priority will be getting enough sleep. Your #4 [this will be your husband's #1] will be not running out diapers (or nappies in Richard's case) and, if you're not breastfeeding, not running out of formula. Somewhere around 5th place is keeping enough laundry clean to where you can leave the house in something that doesn't smell offensive. 6th place would probably be being able to find a clean pot, plate or cup. 7th is keeping the bills current enough to where they don't turn off the electricity & water. . .


 Greg obviously overlooked Dad's #1 priority (at least after the first couple weeks). . .

and . . . 





> WARNING - Pregnancy and complexity do not mix. Any randomness or stupidity is the fault of the hormones... honest !!<?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-comfficeffice" /><o></o>


 Now granted my girls are 25, 20 & almost 18, but if memory serves, when I heard this it was (and I quote)
"Any randomness or stupidity is the fault of the *husband*!"


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## cornflakegirl (Oct 14, 2008)

Stupidity at work is the fault of the hormones. It's only stupidity at home that's the husband's fault!


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## Long Nose (Oct 14, 2008)

cornflakegirl said:


> Stupidity at work is the fault of the hormones. It's only stupidity at home that's the husband's fault!



I wouldn't touch that with a ten foot pole.


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## cornflakegirl (Oct 14, 2008)

I'm not intending to be controversial. But it is a truth universally acknowledged that a hormonally-induced change in temperament leads to your nearest and dearest getting it in the neck!


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## riaz (Oct 14, 2008)

er..what's a hormonal change?


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## HalfAce (Oct 14, 2008)

> Stupidity at work is the fault of the hormones. It's only stupidity at home that's the husband's fault!


You must be a pretty forgiving person (or... not married too many years yet.) All I know is I've been getting blamed for her stupidity at work too!


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## Smitty (Oct 14, 2008)

I'm on the not changing diapers bandwagon too.  Cyndi was all over that, so I've only changed a few with our one and only little girl.

And breastfed or not, that stuff's still toxic waste!  (This from a guy who used to get covered in cow & horse siht for a living. )

Speaking of breastfeeding, I also got to sleep pretty soundly throughout, because Cyndi figured out how to do it in her sleep.  I've got to admit I've been really lucky with all of those responsibilities, as she's a stay-at-home mom and works from home to boot.


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## cornflakegirl (Oct 15, 2008)

Nyanko said:


> ..... don't burst my bubble, guys. I just keep repeating to myself that everything WILL be amazing and maybe I'll have some extra time to learn another language too.
> 
> [/denial]



Good news! Today's Guardian has announced new research showing that giving birth improves learning ability. (I've learnt all my VBA since giving birth, so it must be true!)


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## riaz (Oct 15, 2008)

cornflakegirl said:


> Good news! Today's Guardian has announced new research showing that giving birth improves learning ability. (I've learnt all my VBA since giving birth, so it must be true!)



Maybe that's why I struggle with VBA and always will.


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## Nyanko (Oct 15, 2008)

Wow ..... I come back to the board after a day or so and find out I've stirred up a real hornets nest !!!!! 

First off we all start discussing the *ahem* poop we get given at work and end up just talking about poop !!!


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## cornflakegirl (Oct 15, 2008)

Nyanko said:


> Wow ..... I come back to the board after a day or so and find out I've stirred up a real hornets nest



I think you may have had some help in that from The Hijacker and his apprentice...

(Bet you never knew they gave out MVP awards for services against feminism  )


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## Richard Schollar (Oct 15, 2008)

Hey! I resent that - I said women were superior to men!  How is that anti-feminist?


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## cornflakegirl (Oct 15, 2008)

Actions speak louder than words, Mr Schollar!


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## Richard Schollar (Oct 15, 2008)

cornflakegirl said:


> Actions speak louder than words, Mr Schollar!


 
***mumble, mumble, whinge, grump***


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## cornflakegirl (Oct 15, 2008)




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