# New Arrival Challenge!



## Lewiy (Feb 11, 2011)

So, my first baby is due in two weeks and I’m getting quite excited (as you do!).
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However, no new arrival would be complete without an Excel or VBA themed t-shirt bearing a geeky slogan relating to fatherhood.

So my challenge to you all is to come up with some ideas for a t-shirt slogan that I can make as I’m keen to use some of that iron on transfer paper that I bought with such good intentions two years ago!!

Also, I’ll need something to keep me occupied on paternity leave I’m sure……..


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## schielrn (Feb 11, 2011)

This one is pretty funny for a wife, but its a little late for that now:

http://www.thinkgeek.com/tshirts-apparel/kids/bc2c/

Congrats!!!

I'll see what I can think of in the next few days.


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## shg (Feb 11, 2011)

"Mom gives me Formula.

Dad gives me Formulas."


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## schielrn (Feb 11, 2011)

shg4421 said:


> "Mom gives me Formula.
> 
> Dad gives me Formulas."


 That is good.

I think you should take the responses given to a poll?


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## Joe4 (Feb 11, 2011)

> "Mom gives me Formula.
> 
> Dad gives me Formulas."


That is pretty good. I can almost see a Far Side comic come out of this, with a professor at a chalkboard with a long proof and a baby sitting in a high chair with a caption something like:

_"Dr. Smith's first attempt to give his baby formula is deemed a complete failure."_


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## shg (Feb 11, 2011)

> _"Dr. Smith's first attempt to give his baby formula is deemed a complete failure."_


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## MrKowz (Feb 11, 2011)

Only thing I could think of.


```
If Me.Hungry = True Then
    Me.Action = "Cry"
ElseIf Me.Tired = True Then
   Me.Action = "Sleep"
Else
   Me.Action = "Poop"
End If
```


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## RobMatthews (Feb 11, 2011)

As the father of a 9week old girl, in addition to Miss 2, may i seek to offer a correction?


```
OPTION EXPLICIT
Public Sub BabyLife
Me.Action = "Cry"
Do While Age<6months
    If Me.Hungry = True Then
       Me.Action = "DoubleCry"
    ElseIf Me.Tired = True Then
       Me.Action = "Cry" 
       If RND()>0.8 then 
            Me.Action = "Whimper"
            Me.Action = "Sleep" 
       End If
    Else
        If DayCounter > 10 And Inconvenience > 1 then
                Me.Action = "Poop"
        End If
    End If
Loop
End Sub
```
And I didn't declare the variables because it's just for a T-Shirt (But you know you have to be explicit...), and you know there are gonna be errors in in formula that seeks to emulate a baby...


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## MrKowz (Feb 11, 2011)

> ```
> If RND()>0.8 then
> Me.Action = "Whimper"
> Me.Action = "Sleep"
> ...


RND!


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## JamesW (Feb 14, 2011)

Not related but I really want this t-shirt for my future kids:

"Santa isn't real. It's okay, I can't read yet."


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## cornflakegirl (Feb 14, 2011)

Congratulations Lewiy - do you know what flavour you're having?

(Don't have any slogan suggestions - my brain still isn't functioning due to sleep deprivation...)


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## DonkeyOte (Feb 14, 2011)

lots of cells and lots of sheets


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## RoryA (Feb 14, 2011)

Date
concatenate lower mid
growth
improduct


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## DonkeyOte (Feb 14, 2011)

Rory, took far longer than is respectable for me to get that !


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## RoryA (Feb 14, 2011)

Obviously your mind is too pure...


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## SuperFerret (Feb 14, 2011)

rorya said:


> Date
> concatenate lower mid
> growth
> improduct


 
I must have a filthy mind then cos I got it at the first glance


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## cornflakegirl (Feb 14, 2011)

I still don't get it. I'm treating that as a good thing!


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## RoryA (Feb 14, 2011)

Ahh, the innocence of youth.


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## shg (Feb 14, 2011)

That's very funny! In that vein,

Floor
Union
Effect EOMonth CountBlank NPer
Round
Large
DProduct


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## DonkeyOte (Feb 14, 2011)

SMALL(,1) LARGE(,1) pre UNION ?


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## Gerald Higgins (Feb 17, 2011)

Not a slogan, but may be useful. Then again, perhaps not . . . 




Uploaded with ImageShack.us


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## PaddyD (Feb 17, 2011)

Given my signature, perhaps:

One plus one equals three for lascivious values of one

??


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## Lewiy (Feb 18, 2011)

cornflakegirl said:


> Congratulations Lewiy - do you know what flavour you're having?
> 
> (Don't have any slogan suggestions - my brain still isn't functioning due to sleep deprivation...)


 

Nope, flavour unknown as yet, we're saving the surprise for the day!!

It does mean that all the baby stuff is currently yellow and cream!


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## RoryA (Feb 18, 2011)

Lewiy said:


> It does mean that all the baby stuff is currently yellow and cream!



Yeah, that is the only real downside. And there doesn't seem to be anywhere near as much _neutral_ clothing available.


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## Expiry (Feb 18, 2011)

I once sent my wife an Excel valentine's card which went along the lines of

=IF(AND(DAY(TODAY())=14,MONTH(TODAY())=2),"I LOVE YOU, VERY MUCH","WHERE'S MY DINNER, WOMAN!")

You could adapt that to the due date. Something like:

=IF(TODAY() < XXX,"FANCY A BEER, LADS?","WHERE'S THAT NAPPY")


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## SuperFerret (Feb 18, 2011)

Expiry said:


> I once sent my wife an Excel valentine's card which went along the lines of
> 
> =IF(AND(DAY(TODAY())=14,MONTH(TODAY())=2),"I LOVE YOU, VERY MUCH","WHERE'S MY DINNER, WOMAN!")


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## Gerald Higgins (Feb 18, 2011)

Expiry, is this whole subject close to your heart ?


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## DonkeyOte (Feb 19, 2011)

Expiry said:


> I once sent my wife an Excel valentine's card which went along the lines of
> 
> =IF(AND(DAY(TODAY())=14,MONTH(TODAY())=2),"I LOVE YOU, VERY MUCH","WHERE'S MY DINNER, WOMAN!")



Inscribed: "Saw this Volatile card and thought of you!"


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## Expiry (Feb 21, 2011)

It is indeed. I'm watching this space closely as we're expecting in June. So, I will bwe stealing any good ideas that crop up.

There must be something around Insert, Name, Define


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## RoryA (Feb 21, 2011)

Expiry said:


> There must be something around Insert, Name, Define



I like it!

We're July.


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## cornflakegirl (Feb 21, 2011)

rorya said:


> Yeah, that is the only real downside. And there doesn't seem to be anywhere near as much _neutral_ clothing available.



When my elder son was born I found some brilliant vests in orange and lime green - that's the sort of neutral clothing you really want!

Expiry, Rory - congratulations both - v exciting!


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## SuperFerret (Feb 21, 2011)

cornflakegirl said:


> When my elder son was born I found some brilliant vests in orange and lime green - that's the sort of neutral clothing you really want!


 
My best friend didn't find out what she was having, but being a hardcore rocker bought a selection of babygro's in various shades of black 

I had a few specially printed with things like "Rockstar in Training" and one which was their favorite "Which ones the Guiness boob?"


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